Healthy Relationships

Does your romantic relationship exhibit these qualities?

• caring: partners care for each other and profess that caring openly
• friendship: partners are friends first and have fun together
• acceptance: partners accept each other as they are
• open communication: partners listen to each other and say what's on their minds
• trust: partners trust each other and are trustworthy
• equality: partners are equal in power and share decision-making
• safety: partners respect each other's boundaries and resolve conflicts without violence
• mutual support: partners support each other's goals and values

Watch for these warning signs in your partner:

• Controlling behavior: Your partner insists on always knowing where you are, who you are with, and what you are doing; your partner tries to prevent you from seeing friends and family
• Jealousy: Your partner flies into a rage any time you pay attention to someone else and accuses you of being unfaithful
• Disrespect: Your partner is mean or rude to you
• Violence: Your partner hits, slaps, shoves, kicks, punches, or otherwise physically abuses you
• Alcohol & Drugs: Your partner abuses alcohol or drugs and pressures you to do so as well
• Exploitation: Your partner makes you do things sexually that you are uncomfortable with
• Secrecy: Your partner doesn't acknowledge you or your relationship openly

Watch for these warning signs in yourself:

• You feel controlled, threatened, isolated, or put down by your partner
• You always feel drained, anxious, or unsure of yourself around your partner
• You argue about the same things again and again
• You often have sex but rarely go out together
• What you like most about the relationship is what your partner does for you (money, gifts, etc.)
• You're so wrapped up in the relationship that you have no energy for your studies, hobbies, friends, or family
• You would feel incomplete without a partner

If this describes your relationship, talk to a counselor for help.